I write after a very long time.
Do you know it is true that every human gets that feeling just before it happens. Before everything in life finally stops.
The relief after being suffocated..... is another life.
I wanted to be needed.
Being loved is a luxury.
I am not like them. I am not you.
I was true.
I know it's so difficult to love me.
How do i know?
because no one can be worse than i am with myself.
I am not even as useful as a toilet paper is.
I cannot equate myself with trash because it too was once relevant before becoming irrelevant.
I chose to never marry because my father said if it was him even he wouldn't have married me.
I don't want to give a background because that will portray him negatively.
I say to him he's right.
I always wanted to be a mother.
But am too scared to give life to a soul.
I knew someone for over a decade.
I knew myself for over four.
I never ask WHY when people leave me.
Because every single human has convinced me of my uselessness.
I have nothing against anyone.
It doesn't matter what anyone did.
Be free to abuse me,blame me for everything.
But don't walk into a broken person's life.
Don't tell them they are a good soul.
Don't tell them how kind they are for over a decade.
Don't make them believe they are lovable.
Why build hope and give them life.
Didn't I always say I am a mistake?
--- Written by Vrushali Deshpande
Posts
Change or Self-avenge !
Be a little harsh, be a little cruel, Do not hold too much love within you, Be a mascot of pretense and tell the world you are kool! Harden yourself; let your heart freeze, Control your life! But don’t let yourself be at ease. Splash iced water on those puffy eyes to punish your tears; Challenge your innocence hard enough to fight your life-long fears, Change yourself totally; be the one you were never were, Give up your desire to get cared; sacrifice your intent to feel love Mute your feelings towards God; silent your belief in faith Stop fooling yourself with hopes and accept this damn fate! Written by Vrushali Deshpande
